This is Joveta’s Week 2 Submission
I’m sorry (no, not really), but it’s true. Alliance, you’ve got a lot of nifty things, but when it comes down to it, Horde has you beat hands-down.
Ogre Loin Cloths
You just wish you had a quest that let you dig up a Ripped Ogre Loincloth. Alliance, you may have a cutesy pet in Feralas, but Horde gets fashion. Alternate recommendation for those in the audience saying to themselves, “But Jove… Why would I want a gray item?” Simple! Slap an armor kit on one of these babies and give ‘em to your tanks to combat healer boredom during trash pulls. Fashionable and useful!
I don’t know about you, but I like a little variety in my transportation. Alliance, you’ve got gryphons and boats. Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with utility, but in addition to wyverns and boats, Horde gets Zeppelins. It’s an attractive way to cross the ocean without that pesky seasickness, plus it’s character-building to participate in anything created by goblins and engineers; you never know when it might blow up in your face.
He is the Warchief. Not only is he a kick-butt shammy who can chain lightning your face into the dirt, in the past, he’s been spotted riding a pally horse and getting his mack on with two cute blonde humans at the same time. Who does Alliance have who can compete? Definitely not…
Related to the above, we hordies can actually kill that @$%%!# Staghelm up in his tree in Darnassus. Alliance just gets to fantasize about it. Isn’t that just like an “I win” button right there?
Sorry, Alliance. Your options are “short and creepy” or “gorilla.” Horde men have actual variety in shape and appearance, and as such present something for everyone. Like green and well-muscled? We have orcs. Tall and blue? Trolls win, and have an awesome dance to boot. Fur? Taurens, if that’s your thing. Like something you can go shopping with? Blood elves are beautiful and can also give you hair-care advice. Prefer your men deep and gothy? Undead. (Also, why is the Alliance trapped in a VH1 “I love the…” special when it comes to dances? Horde men at least are in the correct century.)
Oh Silvermoon City, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways…
Face it, Silvermoon is what every city wishes it could be. It’s awesome enough, it deserves it’s own list.
If one is good, two is twice as good
Twice the banks and auction houses, twice as good, right? That’s right, folks. Silvermoon is the only city with dual banks and auction houses. I’m sorry, Alliance, you’re stuck with just the one per town.
Mailboxes to infinity
Have you counted the mailboxes in Silvermoon? There are approximately 15-billion. Unlike all those other towns where you literally need to “run to the mailbox” (of which you can choose between 2 or 3) in Silvermoon, one is never more than 25-feet away. Goblins totally deliver faster there, too.
It’s clean and pretty
Not only was it planned by an architect with an eye for appearances, magic keeps the streets clean 24/7. Enough said.
None of your cities has a rock band in residence. Silvermoon does.
Because it must be mentioned… When it comes time to settle down and engage in some romantic interlude with your sweetie, which do you prefer? A quiet inn off the beaten track, sumptuously decorated and lovely? Or Goldshire, a ratty, falling-down, decrepit and noisy place with dingy sheets and bedbugs?
Got any additions to the awesome? Any alliance want to come take me down a peg and try to prove me wrong?